I love that ... memory as a sacred act. As such, do you ritualize memory in some way, Jen? I've been thinking about that a lot myself ... accessing memory more methodically rather than just randomly. I guess things like birthdays, holiday, anniversaries, and other annual gatherings are one way to ritualize memory. Visiting a gravesite each year. Looking at wedding photos on your anniversary. I wonder how we can do this for other kinds of memories?
Oh Charity, this is absolutely beautiful. What a gift to read your words, and in them such encouragement, companionship through your sharing and so much food for thought. Your reflection on memory as a map is extraordinary, powerful and deeply moving (and helpful. I want to return to your words again and again). Welcome back - I loved every bit of this WR and your plans for how it’s evolving.
Thank you so much, Jenni. I also love thinking of memory as a map. And if I understand neuroscience correctly, memories do create a type of map in our brain, with various connections between them. It's amazing how much our brain remembers without us considering is a "memory" (like how to do simple tasks we don't even think about).
First of all, Charity, my condolences to you and your family at the loss of your mom.
I agree with Christina, I also found myself slowing down to read your words and let them be a balm to my soul. I read on my iPad, away from the notification pop-ups on my phone (some necessary - family thousands of miles away; some really do need switched off!). I’m pulling together some presentations and try as much as possible to use my husband’s photography. His photos are landscapes and close-ups of nature mingled with photos of our boys when they were little, on Christmas days and family vacations, and other family members including those no longer with us. It felt hard to go through the years, sometimes to the point of breathlessness. Those were days when we could always expect to get on a plane and get get back to our family in Scotland, if need be. Now it’s closing on two years and I miss my people. It was hard to go back with the help of the photos, but also helpful. It’s good to be reminded of what we have had and the blessing in that.
Thank you for your kind words, and also for sharing your experiences of sorting through the photos. How remarkable to revisit so many memories through them. I love taking photos, but I'm not very good at cataloguing them and keeping them in albums like my mom was. I do scroll through the photos on my phone a lot, though. Having them date-stamped and geo-cached is a great gift (though maybe not so good for privacy!).
Charity, for the first time in weeks, I found that while reading your words I was slowing down enough to actually read and digest. You have a way of writing deliberately beautiful experiences, even if they are extremely hard. Thank you for the balms of truth for a fellow weary traveler.
Thank you so much, Christina. I'm so grateful that this is how my words are received ... as though coming from a fellow traveler. That's very much how I feel. And the idea that my words might help you slow down for a minute ... that's gold!
Charity, so beautiful. I am so glad you are exploring what I like to call the fog of memory. I love reading your reports. Thank you for sharing. I resonate with so much that you said in this piece. Christine Langford
The fog of memory is such a great phrase, Christine. This week (September 17), I'm planning to explore some of the dangers of memory ... and the fogginess you mention is one. While the phrase "hindsight is 20/20" seems to suggest we always see things in the past so clearly, I find that's not always true.
I think of memory as a sacred act. Thanks for these reflections.
I love that ... memory as a sacred act. As such, do you ritualize memory in some way, Jen? I've been thinking about that a lot myself ... accessing memory more methodically rather than just randomly. I guess things like birthdays, holiday, anniversaries, and other annual gatherings are one way to ritualize memory. Visiting a gravesite each year. Looking at wedding photos on your anniversary. I wonder how we can do this for other kinds of memories?
I'm not sure I'm good at ritualizing it other than these ways you've mentioned. Great question!
Oh Charity, this is absolutely beautiful. What a gift to read your words, and in them such encouragement, companionship through your sharing and so much food for thought. Your reflection on memory as a map is extraordinary, powerful and deeply moving (and helpful. I want to return to your words again and again). Welcome back - I loved every bit of this WR and your plans for how it’s evolving.
Thank you so much, Jenni. I also love thinking of memory as a map. And if I understand neuroscience correctly, memories do create a type of map in our brain, with various connections between them. It's amazing how much our brain remembers without us considering is a "memory" (like how to do simple tasks we don't even think about).
This is SO fascinating!!
First of all, Charity, my condolences to you and your family at the loss of your mom.
I agree with Christina, I also found myself slowing down to read your words and let them be a balm to my soul. I read on my iPad, away from the notification pop-ups on my phone (some necessary - family thousands of miles away; some really do need switched off!). I’m pulling together some presentations and try as much as possible to use my husband’s photography. His photos are landscapes and close-ups of nature mingled with photos of our boys when they were little, on Christmas days and family vacations, and other family members including those no longer with us. It felt hard to go through the years, sometimes to the point of breathlessness. Those were days when we could always expect to get on a plane and get get back to our family in Scotland, if need be. Now it’s closing on two years and I miss my people. It was hard to go back with the help of the photos, but also helpful. It’s good to be reminded of what we have had and the blessing in that.
Thank you for your kind words, and also for sharing your experiences of sorting through the photos. How remarkable to revisit so many memories through them. I love taking photos, but I'm not very good at cataloguing them and keeping them in albums like my mom was. I do scroll through the photos on my phone a lot, though. Having them date-stamped and geo-cached is a great gift (though maybe not so good for privacy!).
Charity, for the first time in weeks, I found that while reading your words I was slowing down enough to actually read and digest. You have a way of writing deliberately beautiful experiences, even if they are extremely hard. Thank you for the balms of truth for a fellow weary traveler.
Thank you so much, Christina. I'm so grateful that this is how my words are received ... as though coming from a fellow traveler. That's very much how I feel. And the idea that my words might help you slow down for a minute ... that's gold!
Charity, so beautiful. I am so glad you are exploring what I like to call the fog of memory. I love reading your reports. Thank you for sharing. I resonate with so much that you said in this piece. Christine Langford
The fog of memory is such a great phrase, Christine. This week (September 17), I'm planning to explore some of the dangers of memory ... and the fogginess you mention is one. While the phrase "hindsight is 20/20" seems to suggest we always see things in the past so clearly, I find that's not always true.
Beautiful Charity. Thank you for sharing this with us.