I love all of this so much. I can’t wait for you to explore this theme! I’m a week behind on my WR but it’s actually the message I needed to read this Sunday morning, on rooting our true identity and belonging, in the Lord. Thank you so much, Charity. Now I get to read the next issue right away! And, oh, your discovering that card! ❤️
Thank you so much for these encouraging words, Jenni. As per my usual, I've likely bitten off more than I can chew. But it feels like there's a lot to explore here over the coming weeks.
Thank you for this post, it was an encouraging reminder! One of the symptoms I experience from having a self-belonging mindset is anxiety. Sometimes my thoughts run circles around my problems: How can I fix them? What plan, approach, or habit should I execute, implement, or practice to make things better? I wonder what to do about things that could not change or won't change fast enough. Remembering I am not my own helps me feel that I am not on my own; God will help me because I am His and He is mine forever (Ps. 73). Thank you again.
What an important insight, Melissa, and I think I share your symptoms. Anxiety is my default when things are out of my control. I love this thought of yours: "Remembering I am not my own helps me feel that I am not on my own." I think this is a real key. As comforting as it is to remember the benefits of belonging to God, I think this truth as some real and important bearing in how we belong to one another, too. When we acknowledge our interconnectedness, we can count on (at least to some degree) people to show up for us as we show up for them. On a more practical note, I wonder ... how do go about "remembering" that you belong to God? This is something I'm exploring in my own life.
"... we belong to one another, too..." I wholeheartedly agree!
I'm also figuring out how to "remind" myself that I belong to God. For me this year, putting this in action looks like challenging my anxious thoughts w. When I challenge my negative thinking by evaluating whether my thoughts align with what's true (Phil 4:8), I end up remembering verses that I previously didn't "feel" like remembering (i.e., believing). I'm also reminded by other believers in my life. And by art (music, films, your writing!) that encourages me to remember what I know about God.
“We’re used to getting our way. That’s what it means to be human.” I would say that’s what it means to be American, maybe even Western. There are plenty of places in this world were people are quite accustomed to not getting their way. Kind of driving home your point, these places also seem to be more communitarian in nature vs. individualistic. IMO, what we see are Americans (especially those of particular demographics) throwing a collective hissy fit, in much the same way a child being told no for the first time would.
I think are some questions to be asked of the church in regards to where we are. I live in a suburban Texas community. I am very distressed by the role many churches have played in condoning this idea that every person should be able to have their own way. So, when we talk of what it means to be human (humane) in a religious context, I believe we have to put a strong magnifying glass to the messages coming from pulpits.
Thank you for the reading of Be still. I have been searching high and low for this exact thing! I had a pastor from Zionsville, IN do this once with a group I was part of, and it was a deeply nourishing experience.
Marianna -- Your comments are so helpful to me as I consider what it means to be human in various contexts. I think you've rightly pointed out how various cultures and circumstances either are better at reminding us that we are not our own ... or, in the unfortunate case of most Western cultures, lend to the deception that we are. I have a feeling that "wanting to get our way" is part of the broader human experience, even when being "used to getting our way" is not. And like you, I think the church can be just as loud a voice as other parts of our culture in encouraging us to belong to ourselves, look out for number one, defend "our rights," and take what's ours.
What do you think would be one message from the pulpit right now that would speak to this moment in history to encourage people to remember they do not belong to themselves? That's what your comment has me asking myself. I don't think there's only one, but it would be a place to start. In that same vane, I'm wondering what God might be calling me specifically to do to better live this out in my own life.
I'm so glad the reading of Be Still was a blessing. And you used to live in Zionsville? We are moving to a community very near there in a few weeks.
Your distinction between “wanting” and “being used to” is valuable. I agree all humans, regardless of culture etc., want their own way, and we are all prone to forgetting how impossible that is.
Your questions are good questions. Ones I will be thinking on, as well.
We actually lived in Carmel right on the border with Westfield. I love the Indianapolis area, and still miss it in many ways-especially how livable it is. Where will you be moving to?
We are moving to Whitestown, which may have been just a tiny rural town when you lived in the area. It's now one of the fast-growing areas of the Indy metro area!
Thanks for this, Charity. I belong to Christ, and have to be reminded of that when the sin nature prevails.
But how do we think about individuality associated with just wanting to get our way, being selfish or prideful, and maintaining comfort vs. the individuality of going along with others' desires and wants (sometimes for years), not being/feeling secure in who we are, not standing up for ourselves. I also believe God made us individuals. And I believe service to Him/others is obedience. But when there isn't a clear right/wrong, where is the line that says.."It's ok for me to say no/yes to this thing? It's ok for me to step up here. I don't have to go along with this thing or that thing."
Those kinds of struggles are on my mind now. Is being mindful of one's own...self, including desires, values, etc., necessarily synonymous with selfishness and narcissism? Perhaps what I need to think about is: I am not my own. Nor am I another human's. (Except how is that to look in marriage? ) I am God's.
Rhonda ... it seems like I've created far more questions for you with this essay than answers. And I think that's a good thing. Many of these same questions are swirling around my own thoughts. Alan Noble's thoughts about belonging to God vs self belonging are so dense that it was a challenge to try to extract a few key thoughts for this post.
In a nutshell, I'd respond by saying that belonging to God ideally frees us from a lot of the pressure that we and others put on ourselves to identify, justify, and define ourselves. We have a lot of grace to not always be trying to optimize ourselves (or others, really). The idea of being human, then, is an acknowledgment of limits, an acceptance of imperfections, and a recognition that we were made for relationship with God and others above things like efficiency or productivity.
I think this is where I've created some confusion: because being human, in Noble's argument, is the goal. Achieving God's created purposes for us. It's not the sin nature that we are trying to resist. He's not excusing sin or inviting us into sinful habits or behaviors. He's just using the this idea of "being human" as part of our image bearing capacity.
To touch on that final sentence or two in your comments: Noble would actually say that we do belong to others, as a subset of belonging to God. Not in a way that strips us of our identity as God's beloved, but as a way to redirect God's love for us. We are providentially connected to our families, our churches, our communities, etc., and we can never really strip away the parts of us that are influenced by these connections. By belonging to God, and thereby belonging to others, we always have to factor them in. We can't redefine ourselves to the extent that we sinfully ignore our obligations to others.
I'm sure I've muddled this even more ... and I'm certainly not offering these thoughts as answers to your questions. I mostly just wanted to try to clarify some of the arguments from Noble's book and some of my own thoughts related to what you ask. I think you'd really get a lot out of Noble's book. I'd really recommend it. And I hope you'll keep thinking about these things with me. The project of becoming more human is something we need each other for!
I love how you've responded, Charity. Thank you for taking the time. I'll be re-reading it and sitting with it. This certainly resonates: "God ideally frees us from a lot of the pressure that we and others put on ourselves to identify, justify, and define ourselves." I've experienced energy and joy and freedom straight from God that I've turned right around and stifled myself, all the while blaming others for it.
Oh my goodness, Charity… this is one the best reports you have written. Thank you for sharing the thoughts of David Brooks and Alan Noble along with your ponderings. I have been thinking along these lines lately as well. So looking forward to reading more on this topic of being truly human.
Thank you so much, Sarah! That's so encouraging. It was plenty hard to get my mind around all these ideas ... I have a lot to learn as we forge ahead with this topic. Being human is certainly not easy!
I love all of this so much. I can’t wait for you to explore this theme! I’m a week behind on my WR but it’s actually the message I needed to read this Sunday morning, on rooting our true identity and belonging, in the Lord. Thank you so much, Charity. Now I get to read the next issue right away! And, oh, your discovering that card! ❤️
Thank you so much for these encouraging words, Jenni. As per my usual, I've likely bitten off more than I can chew. But it feels like there's a lot to explore here over the coming weeks.
Nah, you've got this! Besides, if you can't be "human" as you explore this, well! ....
Thank you for this post, it was an encouraging reminder! One of the symptoms I experience from having a self-belonging mindset is anxiety. Sometimes my thoughts run circles around my problems: How can I fix them? What plan, approach, or habit should I execute, implement, or practice to make things better? I wonder what to do about things that could not change or won't change fast enough. Remembering I am not my own helps me feel that I am not on my own; God will help me because I am His and He is mine forever (Ps. 73). Thank you again.
What an important insight, Melissa, and I think I share your symptoms. Anxiety is my default when things are out of my control. I love this thought of yours: "Remembering I am not my own helps me feel that I am not on my own." I think this is a real key. As comforting as it is to remember the benefits of belonging to God, I think this truth as some real and important bearing in how we belong to one another, too. When we acknowledge our interconnectedness, we can count on (at least to some degree) people to show up for us as we show up for them. On a more practical note, I wonder ... how do go about "remembering" that you belong to God? This is something I'm exploring in my own life.
"... we belong to one another, too..." I wholeheartedly agree!
I'm also figuring out how to "remind" myself that I belong to God. For me this year, putting this in action looks like challenging my anxious thoughts w. When I challenge my negative thinking by evaluating whether my thoughts align with what's true (Phil 4:8), I end up remembering verses that I previously didn't "feel" like remembering (i.e., believing). I'm also reminded by other believers in my life. And by art (music, films, your writing!) that encourages me to remember what I know about God.
“We’re used to getting our way. That’s what it means to be human.” I would say that’s what it means to be American, maybe even Western. There are plenty of places in this world were people are quite accustomed to not getting their way. Kind of driving home your point, these places also seem to be more communitarian in nature vs. individualistic. IMO, what we see are Americans (especially those of particular demographics) throwing a collective hissy fit, in much the same way a child being told no for the first time would.
I think are some questions to be asked of the church in regards to where we are. I live in a suburban Texas community. I am very distressed by the role many churches have played in condoning this idea that every person should be able to have their own way. So, when we talk of what it means to be human (humane) in a religious context, I believe we have to put a strong magnifying glass to the messages coming from pulpits.
Thank you for the reading of Be still. I have been searching high and low for this exact thing! I had a pastor from Zionsville, IN do this once with a group I was part of, and it was a deeply nourishing experience.
Marianna -- Your comments are so helpful to me as I consider what it means to be human in various contexts. I think you've rightly pointed out how various cultures and circumstances either are better at reminding us that we are not our own ... or, in the unfortunate case of most Western cultures, lend to the deception that we are. I have a feeling that "wanting to get our way" is part of the broader human experience, even when being "used to getting our way" is not. And like you, I think the church can be just as loud a voice as other parts of our culture in encouraging us to belong to ourselves, look out for number one, defend "our rights," and take what's ours.
What do you think would be one message from the pulpit right now that would speak to this moment in history to encourage people to remember they do not belong to themselves? That's what your comment has me asking myself. I don't think there's only one, but it would be a place to start. In that same vane, I'm wondering what God might be calling me specifically to do to better live this out in my own life.
I'm so glad the reading of Be Still was a blessing. And you used to live in Zionsville? We are moving to a community very near there in a few weeks.
Your distinction between “wanting” and “being used to” is valuable. I agree all humans, regardless of culture etc., want their own way, and we are all prone to forgetting how impossible that is.
Your questions are good questions. Ones I will be thinking on, as well.
We actually lived in Carmel right on the border with Westfield. I love the Indianapolis area, and still miss it in many ways-especially how livable it is. Where will you be moving to?
We are moving to Whitestown, which may have been just a tiny rural town when you lived in the area. It's now one of the fast-growing areas of the Indy metro area!
Thanks for this, Charity. I belong to Christ, and have to be reminded of that when the sin nature prevails.
But how do we think about individuality associated with just wanting to get our way, being selfish or prideful, and maintaining comfort vs. the individuality of going along with others' desires and wants (sometimes for years), not being/feeling secure in who we are, not standing up for ourselves. I also believe God made us individuals. And I believe service to Him/others is obedience. But when there isn't a clear right/wrong, where is the line that says.."It's ok for me to say no/yes to this thing? It's ok for me to step up here. I don't have to go along with this thing or that thing."
Those kinds of struggles are on my mind now. Is being mindful of one's own...self, including desires, values, etc., necessarily synonymous with selfishness and narcissism? Perhaps what I need to think about is: I am not my own. Nor am I another human's. (Except how is that to look in marriage? ) I am God's.
Rhonda ... it seems like I've created far more questions for you with this essay than answers. And I think that's a good thing. Many of these same questions are swirling around my own thoughts. Alan Noble's thoughts about belonging to God vs self belonging are so dense that it was a challenge to try to extract a few key thoughts for this post.
In a nutshell, I'd respond by saying that belonging to God ideally frees us from a lot of the pressure that we and others put on ourselves to identify, justify, and define ourselves. We have a lot of grace to not always be trying to optimize ourselves (or others, really). The idea of being human, then, is an acknowledgment of limits, an acceptance of imperfections, and a recognition that we were made for relationship with God and others above things like efficiency or productivity.
I think this is where I've created some confusion: because being human, in Noble's argument, is the goal. Achieving God's created purposes for us. It's not the sin nature that we are trying to resist. He's not excusing sin or inviting us into sinful habits or behaviors. He's just using the this idea of "being human" as part of our image bearing capacity.
To touch on that final sentence or two in your comments: Noble would actually say that we do belong to others, as a subset of belonging to God. Not in a way that strips us of our identity as God's beloved, but as a way to redirect God's love for us. We are providentially connected to our families, our churches, our communities, etc., and we can never really strip away the parts of us that are influenced by these connections. By belonging to God, and thereby belonging to others, we always have to factor them in. We can't redefine ourselves to the extent that we sinfully ignore our obligations to others.
I'm sure I've muddled this even more ... and I'm certainly not offering these thoughts as answers to your questions. I mostly just wanted to try to clarify some of the arguments from Noble's book and some of my own thoughts related to what you ask. I think you'd really get a lot out of Noble's book. I'd really recommend it. And I hope you'll keep thinking about these things with me. The project of becoming more human is something we need each other for!
I love how you've responded, Charity. Thank you for taking the time. I'll be re-reading it and sitting with it. This certainly resonates: "God ideally frees us from a lot of the pressure that we and others put on ourselves to identify, justify, and define ourselves." I've experienced energy and joy and freedom straight from God that I've turned right around and stifled myself, all the while blaming others for it.
Oh my goodness, Charity… this is one the best reports you have written. Thank you for sharing the thoughts of David Brooks and Alan Noble along with your ponderings. I have been thinking along these lines lately as well. So looking forward to reading more on this topic of being truly human.
May your move go well and be blessed.
Sarah S.
Thank you so much, Sarah! That's so encouraging. It was plenty hard to get my mind around all these ideas ... I have a lot to learn as we forge ahead with this topic. Being human is certainly not easy!